Relieving stress, controlling anger to be a better parent

Published April 13, 2011
By Staff Sgt. Chad Thompson
51st Fighter Wing Public Affairs

OSAN AIR BASE, Republic of Korea -- As part of April's Month of the Military Child and Child Abuse Prevention Month the family advocacy staff will be offering parenting classes, and anger and stress management courses.

Beth Thomas, a family advocacy intervention specialist said managing stress and anger are about understanding the causes and trying to prevent stress and anger from becoming debilitating.

Stress Management:

Stress can come in many forms and in some cases it can be helpful. The stress before a test focuses a person's mind to study; stress in battle makes some military members perform above and beyond their abilities; but if this stress becomes overwhelming, that's when someone should seek help.

"The stress management class is a one-time class that teaches some basic skills on where stress comes from and how each person deals with stress differently," Ms. Thomas said. "Managing stress is about coping skills and finding ways to unwind after a stressful day."

Ms. Thomas said some of the ways she teaches people to manage their stress is deep breathing and progressive muscle relaxation. Some other healthy forms of relieving stress are eating right, getting the right amount of sleep, communicating to friends and family, exercising and meditation.

She said finding the positive in a situation and not dwelling on negatives is another important way of dealing with stress.

"Some people get wrapped around trying to control everything in life, and that ends up stressing them out," Ms. Thomas said. "In most cases they need to calm down and realize the situation is not that bad."

Everyone manages stress a little differently but the important part is that everyone find something they enjoy doing, she said. "Every little thing helps in managing stress."

Anger Management:

Anger is much like stress, and in some ways can be directly related -- the more stressed people get could make their angry outbursts happen more frequently.

Ms. Thomas said an important part of parenting is controlling one's emotions and not acting out in anger.

"Realize there are a lot of things in life that can't be controlled and it is okay to get angry," she said. "You just can't let the anger control you and the way you think."

Ms. Thomas said the anger management class offered at the family advocacy office is a four-week class and can be started at any time. The class covers anger styles, faulty ways of thinking, irrational thoughts, and how to get out of that frame of mind when someone starts getting angry.

Ms. Thomas also said the stress and anger classes are not considered therapy. There are no records kept and everyone who attends can be assured their leadership will not be notified they attended.

"These classes are strictly voluntary," Ms. Thomas said. "It's better for someone to seek the help they need before leadership gets involved."

"1-2-3 Magic" Parenting Class:

The family advocacy staff also offers a parenting class called "1-2-3 Magic" that teaches a non-emotional approach to disciplining children.

Ms. Thomas said this class is mainly for parents with children from 3 to 12 years old but the family advocacy staff can accommodate children of all ages.

"Your child may be out of control, and you may not know what to do or what to try ... come to the class and see if this approach will work," she said. "It could be that they need a positive approach and this could possibly turn it all around for you."

Ms. Thomas said the family advocacy office is available for anything anyone needs help with in dealing with their children, or eliminating stress and anger from their lives. The staff is flexible and can make briefings as long or as short as needed.

"We can come to you for whatever you may need," she said.

For more information on the classes offered at family advocacy call 784-5010.

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